We met 3-month old Bill for the first time last week. Graham, his proud owner, brought him in to TCFP’s offices.
When we first met, in 2015, Graham was really concerned about how he’d survive without work.
Nothing happened after our first meeting. But lots happened in that meeting.
We chatted, I made some basic, helpful suggestions. It wasn’t the right time to get fully engaged, if it had it would have happened. There’s no great mystery to these things, it’s right when it’s right.
About a year later it was the right time. He was very welcome to come over for a chat, not least because I remembered him as decent, appreciative and willing to listen. I’m astonished by those who, having sought professional advice, aren’t – why on earth bother?
This meeting really got him thinking, now he was ready. Over the course of the next two or three months, we were able to coax out real answers to some important questions.
What would he do if it were up to him? What was stopping him? What’s does a life well lived mean for him? Why? Where does he want to go? To do what? What was really important to him?
Like everyone we meet he had what we call “payslip blinkers”. We get used to the number on that payslip and any other possible monthly budget seems out of the question.
It rarely turns out to be the case. It’s interesting how many ways we restrict our thinking without realising it.
A large part of our role in those early days are to help expand people’s horizons, to help the scales fall from their eyes.
That means giving the time and space to think and question and that requires listening and encouragement. Giving him that time and space has helped him change his life.
It has allowed him to help both sons financially, have a great trip to watch the British and Irish Lions tour New Zealand, book a trip to the Ryder Cup in Paris, and welcome Bill the bulldog into his life…
Now he’s trying to get his head around not working altogether.
His numbers say he can tomorrow, his emotions say he shouldn’t, not just yet. But he’s heading in the right direction, he’s cut down his hours to see “how it feels”.
With our help and Bill’s we’ll get him over the line.